America’s 2020 presidential election is dominating attention at home and around the world. Millions of Americans have already cast their votes, and many more will vote before Tuesday is over.

Some commentators have called this the most significant American election since the Civil War. The candidates have spent a record-smashing $6.6 billion on their campaigns in hopes of victory.

“Election” comes from the Latin word eligere, which simply means to “pick out” or “choose.” A democratic election is the process of citizens selecting people to represent them in government for a limited term. More broadly, an election is the process of citizens deciding what matters most to them as a society.

In this election season, I have felt politically homeless, and I’ve heard the same from many others. As a Christian and ethicist, no party or candidate adequately represents my beliefs and values. Voting one way or another felt like honoring some of my convictions while betraying others. As I stood in line to cast my ballot, I couldn’t help reflecting on the fact that this election is structured by access to massive money, exclusive connections, and tribalistic loyalty in the pursuit of power... Read More

Dear friends,

In Stop & Think today, I’m discussing President Donald Trump’s remarks about Ethiopia’s hydroelectric dam during a recent phone call with the Prime Ministers of Israel and Sudan. You can watch the call here and read a BBC article with helpful context here.

You may be unfamiliar with this situation, but I believe President Trump’s handling of it has both local and global importance. Ethiopia has called it an “incitement of war.”

Trump’s conversation about Ethiopia was only three minutes long. But it was a microcosm of much of his communication. As always, his words have reverberated across the world, and, as often, they carry serious implications for hundreds of millions of people. The tone, posture, and content of his statement touch on fundamental issues of intercultural leadership and how to work — or not work — toward peaceful societies where people can not only survive but thrive.

To provide some context about why I care so much about this particular conversation, let me begin with a word about my journey in Ethiopia... Read More

Dear Friends,

As an ethics professor, I’ve had the privilege of teaching many excellent students in America, Ethiopia, Germany, and West Africa. Through the years, some of these students have become dear friends. And I’ve observed that these exemplary people often share several overlapping qualities.

They read rigorously. They think deeply. They ask hard questions. They discuss thoughtfully. They pray earnestly. They travel widely. They cherish friendship. They serve others sincerely.

At root, these are all practices of self-transcendence, of looking beyond oneself and exposing oneself to new ideas, places, people, and God.

And yet, over the years, I’ve watched these exemplary people come to  different conclusions on faith, morality, and politics. Sometimes they come to radically different conclusions — whether they be more “conservative” or more “liberal,” more similar to how they were raised or more dissimilar. Some of these divergences happen in the same family or between close friends.

Observing my students grow has taught me a priceless lesson in radical humility, radical patience, radical nonviolence, radical love... Read More

Dear friends,

This week I’m delighted to share my interview on ideological and political healing with the Ask a Spiritual Director Podcast. We explore questions of how ideological and political injuries begin, how these wounds can heal, and what we can do to be part of this healing.

This topic is so timely in Ethiopia, America, and many other contexts, and I’m grateful to the hosts of this exciting podcast for inviting me to discuss it with them.

As always, thanks for stopping and thinking with me.

Yours,

Andrew

 .. Read More

Dear friends,

This week I’m writing about the controversial movie Cuties.

Some its content is graphic, disturbing, and sickening. But like a war movie that studies the realities of human violence to cry out for peace, this film is asking essential, inescapable questions about our increasingly sexualized, Internet-driven, interconnected world, especially as it affects children. Wrestling with these heavy questions can help us cultivate healthier children, families, and cultures.

It seems to me that some of the controversy surrounding this film is driven by the misleading way Netflix advertised it, which appears to celebrate the sexualization of little girls, when this is the evil this film is investigating and lamenting. My interest is in the actual movie and its subtle message.

Perhaps another outraging aspect about this movie is not only its depiction of how our cultures sexually abuse children but its refusal to satisfy our culture’s hunger for simplistic answers, whether they be “religious” or “secular,” “traditional” or “progressive,” “conservative” or “liberal.”.. Read More

Dear friends,

Stop and think with me about two questions that may initially appear unrelated but have huge practical importance.

First, how do you pray about your enemies?

Second, how are you preparing for conflict or peace in your society?

Psalms against the Enemy

I recently reread the Book of Psalms, and I was struck by how frequently the psalmist talks to God about his enemies.

Out of 150 psalms, “enemies” are mentioned 93 times, “foes” 40 times, and “the wicked” 104 times. Interestingly, the enemy is one of the central topics — or targets — of this book of prayers. David meditates on his enemies seemingly all the time when he talks to God.

But what really struck me is the content of these prayers. David never prays for his enemies to be changed or healed. That’s not on his mind or in his desires. He also never prays for them to be forgiven or experience mercy, even as David famously confesses his own failures and begs God for mercy (see Psalm 51)... Read More

Dear friends,

This weekend, I had the incredible privilege of marrying two very dear friends: Jenna Herskind and Tyler Heath. My sermon articulates why I believe marriage matters for our world today, and I wanted to share it with you.

Deep love and congratulations to Jenna and Tyler!
Andrew

Why Marriage Is Radical

Two thousand years ago, history changed forever. A revolution of self-giving love began in the heart of the human condition that opened the way to everlasting life. And I believe this ancient revolution shows us God’s design for holy marriage still today.

In occupied Bethlehem, under the shadow of a violent empire, Jesus was born to poor parents, Joseph and Mary. Before Jesus was born, his passionate mother sang a prophetic song about how her son would turn things upside down, bringing good news to the poor, hungry, and powerless.

And Mary was right. When he was just a little older than Tyler and Jenna, Jesus began preaching and embodying God’s love and justice for the poor, oppressed, and powerless... Read More

Life is training me in patient waiting and hopeful missing.

Due to the pandemic, my mom and I haven’t done any of our treasured walks this summer. But after three months, we both felt comfortable doing this with masks, and we explored the prairie path together on Saturday.

As we walked, mom talked about things she misses after seven years of being a stroke survivor: cooking, gardening, aerobics, riding horses, going for walks without a wheelchair or cane. Our conversations often return to this place of missing and longing for restoration.

I think there’s something spiritually profound about our missing. We don’t simply move on and forget the blessings of life. We miss them, carry them in our memory, and yearn for them to be restored, even after many years and no sign of their restoration.

I see the ache of missing as a rebellious clue of hope. What we miss will be restored, but not often quickly and not always in this life... Read More

Dear friends,

Last week I had the privilege of doing a podcast interview with Zach Elliot about the Neighbor-Love Movement. Our conversation covers what the Neighbor-Love Movement is, why we started it, and how you can be part of it. I tell some of the stories that mean the world to me, and I’m excited for you to hear them straight from my heart.

You can listen either at www.zachjelliott.com/podcast or LAB: The Podcast on Apple Podcasts.

Yours with gratitude,

Andrew.. Read More

Last Sunday was an extremely special milestone in my journey. It was my brother Joe’s 50th birthday and a reminder of the life-changing power of generosity.

In high school, I became very passionate for God. This passion translated into a passion for study. I started reading the Bible intensely and teaching myself Greek and Hebrew. I discovered books by Bonhoeffer and other authors who profoundly influenced my sense of calling. This came as a surprise to me, because I wasn’t a reader as a child.

A new dream was born in my heart: to attend Wheaton College. Wheaton was the best Christian university in America and the school where some of my heroes had graduated.

There was only one problem, or really three: I didn’t have any money, my parents hadn’t saved for my college education, and Wheaton was very expensive. I knew that God had called me to a life of service for others, and thus taking out heavy student loans didn’t make any sense... Read More

Dear friends,

Christian belief is a gym for radical humility. At its best, faith stretches our capacity for complexity, charity, and careful listening in a time of polarization and culture war.

Consider some pillar beliefs of the Christian faith.

God is Trinity or three-in-one. But Christians have had endless debates about what this means and how the divine persons relate, remaining distinct “persons” but not three different “gods.” Some Christians have condemned other Christians over differences of Trinitarian opinion and vocabulary. But who could claim to dissect the inner nature of God?

Jesus is the Incarnation of God, the God-human. But Christians have had endless debates over what this means and how the two (“natures”? “persons”? “hypostases”?) relate without destroying each other. Whole Christian churches and cultures have divided over this question, all certain they are right and the other wrong.

The bread and cup are the ultimate meal Jesus gave to every Christian. But do they “become” Jesus? “Represent” Jesus?.. Read More

A friend recently asked me why I feel alive making peace and building bridges
between people.

His question caught me off guard and made me stop and think.

I believe every person is a precious diamond made and loved by God. The Bible
teaches that every person is an embodied reflection of their Creator (Genesis 1:26). To
see a person aright is to catch a glimpse of God.

But if there’s a wall between us, we can’t see that precious value.

When the walls come down and a bridge is built, we have the chance to move closer
and see one another’s profound beauty and complexity. Perhaps we even experience
the joyous shock of loving someone we were tempted to hate or of learning from
someone we thought was totally wrong.

My most poignant experiences of God have happened on these bridges, in these shaky
in-between places of peacemaking with others.

These moments always remind me of Jacob’s astonishing words after he saw a vision
of a bridge connecting heaven and earth: “God is in this place, and I didn’t know it”
(Genesis 28:10)... Read More

Dear friends,

Complexity is one of humanity’s greatest challenges and opportunities today.

Dear friends,

Lily and I got married ten years ago on July 8. It was the happiest day of my life, and that day has grown in happiness ever since — a ten-year-long day.

I love Lily far more today than I did, or even knew I could, ten years ago. How profoundly love deepens, expands, and changes us. Lily is the love of my life, my heart, my gift from heaven.

In our marriage, we have discovered how love binds us together in the beauty of our differences and makes us richer than we could ever be alone.

Lily and I were born citizens of different countries, Ethiopia and America.

We were born with different skin colors in different bodies, brown and white.

We grew up speaking different mother tongues, Amharic and English.

We were raised in different religious traditions and cultures, Orthodox and Evangelical.

We have different professional interests, the arts and ethics.

Lily and I are wildly different in so many ways... Read More

Dear friends,

This is an especially joyful and heartbreaking week for Lily and me.

On Wednesday, we will celebrate our tenth wedding anniversary and God’s faithfulness to deepen our love across this last decade. Lily is God’s most precious gift in my life, and I cherish these ten years of marriage with her. Thank you for your friendship and support!

Meanwhile, last Monday night, the famous Oromo singer and activist Hachalu Hundessa was murdered in Addis Ababa. In the protests after his death, at least 166 Ethiopians have been killed, including Hachalu’s uncle, and prominent public figures have been jailed. There is a growing sense of fear, anger, and potential for further violence in the community. Rumors of civil war and ethnic cleansing have returned to Ethiopia.

For my response to the current crisis, please listen to my interview published today with Emnet Tegafaw on her podcast Under the Olive Tree. The English interview begins at minute 5:00.

I had the privilege of interviewing Hachalu on April 19, 2019 in Addis Ababa, and I believe his words carry enormous moral clarity and power for this heartbreaking moment in Ethiopia and around the world... Read More

When you are more, am I less?

When you are stronger, am I weaker?

When you flourish, do I become poorer?

Around the world today, we see that our identities have become competitive and conflictual. We construct our identities by defining (1) who we’re against, (2) how we’re superior, and (3) the struggle for dominance. This is identity by negation and a recipe for war.

The irony is that these apparently “strong” identities are actually weak. They are rooted in fear, poverty, and envy.

What I cherish about neighbor-love and the common good is that they energize positive, mutually enriching identities of hope.

When you are more, I am more.

When you are stronger, I am stronger.

When you flourish, I am enriched.

Loving my neighbor as my self means wishing for them what I wish for my self – love, justice, and flourishing. Here our good becomes common, something shared and mutually strengthening.

True identity is not a zero-sum game or a struggle for domination... Read More

Dear friends,

For the last month, I’ve been taking a crash course in hate. Strangers send me hateful messages and comments often several times a day. My social media has become a hate lab.

Here’s what I’m observing.

1. The essence of hate is the desire for the other not to exist. Hate may use language, exclusion, and/or force, but the core of hate is always the same: the desire for the other to disappear – whether through silencing, expelling, or killing. When someone says, “I hate you,” what they really mean is, “I wish you didn’t exist.”

2. The root of hate is fear. We heard it proclaimed in Charlottesville: “You will not replace us!” People who hate are afraid of being less than others or simply not being all there is. In this way, hate is a kind of optical illusion: it looks strong, but it is weak. It is fueled by a sense of insecurity and danger. The strong don’t need to hate; they have enough self-esteem to coexist with others... Read More

Dear friends,

For new futures that make the best of our pasts, we must abandon the war-making violence of wanting others to disappear, whether by domination (fake-unity) or divorce (fake-diversity).

Against popular assumption, unity and diversity are not opposite but integral. This week, I’m sharing an article I wrote on the subject, published by Ethiopia Insight on April 26, 2020.

This article is a great place to start if you want to learn more about my work with the Neighbor-Love Movement.

Yours,

Andrew

Balinjeraye: Unity and Diversity Are Neighbors, and So Are We

Many people today assume that unity and diversity are enemies. For example, we often hear in politics and religion about the “pro-unity camp” and the “pro-diversity camp.” This binary metaphor pictures unity and diversity as armies on a battlefield struggling for domination.

But the truth is more interesting and challenging: unity and diversity are neighbors. They sustain one another and can’t live well without each other. Take a second look... Read More

Dear friends,

This week I’m sharing a letter from my heart to the beloved people of Ethiopia, but I think it will speak to readers around the world.

I have been receiving many hate messages and deaths threats in response to my work here, and this letter is written as a response to explain my mission. This letter is longer than my usual Stop & Think, so I thank you for your patience.

With deep gratitude for your love and support,
Andrew

Dear Ethiopia: My Unhidden Agenda

Suspicion of outsiders is common in Ethiopian culture. It exists in tension with Ethiopia’s celebrated tradition of hospitality.

This suspicion has deep historical roots.

For example, in the early 1600s, Jesuit missionaries briefly converted Ethiopia’s Orthodox ruler to Catholicism. In this moment, nationalism, religious zeal, and opposition to outsiders became woven together as one. Nation, religion, and independence interlocked. The then Ethiopia understood itself as a country under siege that needed to be protected against invaders... Read More

Dear friends,

Why is Good Friday good? Why should this dark day two thousand years ago still matter for contemporary people and world culture?

On Good Friday, Jesus embodied his most radical principle in the most devastating moment of his life: “Love your enemies” (Matthew 5:44; Luke 6:27).

From the beginning of his career, Jesus taught that loving our enemies is the mark of spiritual perfection, because it reflects God’s unconditionally generous character (Matthew 5:45-48; Luke 6:35-36).

And unlike so many leaders, Jesus resisted hypocrisy when it cost him everything.

First, Jesus was arrested and condemned by a mob jury for his counter-cultural life. Second, Jesus was brutally tortured and viciously ridiculed without cause. Finally, Jesus was unjustly executed in the most humiliating and excruciating manner devised by the Roman Empire: naked crucifixion in public.

It’s difficult to imagine the raw physical pain and psychological torment Jesus suffered. But beyond the suffering of one innocent man, Christians believe that Jesus was the incarnation of God... Read More

Dear friends,

The two countries that I call home – Ethiopia and America – have something unusual in common: influential groups in both countries consider themselves to be God’s new Israel.

These groups tell epic narratives that describe themselves as God’s chosen people, and these stories fuel a powerful sense of national exceptionalism. Exceptionalism means a self-understanding of being different, favored, and specially protected by God.

In both countries, I often hear people proudly say things like, “This is Ethiopia!” or “This is America!” in response to problems affecting other societies. What they mean is that bad things can’t happen in such a chosen, God-favored land.

In the face of the global COVID-19 pandemic, it’s fascinating to revisit the original instructions that God gave to the original Israel concerning contagious disease.

How did chosenness and illness interact?

Leviticus is one of the more boring and bizarre books in the Bible. But it has a striking relevance for today’s COVID pandemic because it is the primary place where the Bible addresses this problem of infectious disease... Read More

Dear friends,

Many of us are walking through a season of grief. In this journey, On Grief and Grieving by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross and David Kessler has been extremely helpful. Special thanks to Duane Grobman for helping me face my grief and to Garrett Dickens for recommending this book to me.

In this essay, I share eighteen of the insights that this process and this book have taught me. Some of these insights may be meaningful to you; some may not.

I hope reading this is useful for you in understanding and embracing your own grieving process and/or walking with a loved one in grief towards healing. I will not offer commentary on the quotations, but many of them are worth extended reflection.

1. Many of us are “grief-illiterate” (xi).

I have discovered my own grief-illiteracy and the truth of these words: “We live in a new death-denying, grief-dismissing world now” (205).

In the Foreword, Maria Shriver brilliantly defines grief: “[Grief] is the opening up to the exquisite pain of absence... Read More

Dear friends,

The caronavirus is revealing a theological crisis in popular Christianity.
Many believers think faith is above or even against science. Thus, they see special
hygiene and public health as unnecessary or even attacking the church. Instead, they say
we should simply pray and ignore practices like washing our hands and social distancing
as proof that we trust God.

But think of it like this.

Every Christian everywhere believes that God – not satan – created the world. The world
is God’s work. The very first verse of the Bible declares this. Paul said it like this: “For in
[Christ] all things were created…and in him all things hold together” (Colossians 1:15-
17).

And this means that science is the study of God’s design. When we understand and
respect science, we understand and respect the way God made us and our world.
Science is spiritual.

Christians actually practice this every day. For example, we don’t jump off buildings
because we recognize gravity as part of God’s creation... Read More

Dear friends,

On February 28, I lost a friend, Caleb Meakins (1989-2020), in a car accident. Grieving Caleb’s death has required me to face afresh our fragility and the brevity of our lives. It has also challenged me to revisit the fundamental question of what is truly valuable and worth living for during our limited time on earth.

This week, I’m sharing a tribute that I wrote for Caleb published today by Addis Standard. I believe Caleb lived an exemplary life marked by kindness, courage, and creativity, and it is a privilege to celebrate him, even as my heart is broken.

As you read about Caleb, I invite you to reflect on your own life and what you consider to be truly valuable and worth living for. In all that we say and do, may we see and celebrate the precious value of one another like Caleb did so beautifully.

Yours,

Andrew

Caleb Meakins (1989-2020): A Tribute

In a time of escalating conflict defined by us vs... Read More

Dear friends,

The world’s attention has been gripped with the spread of the coronavirus or COVID-19.  The increasing fear of a global pandemic has provoked me to reflect on the spread of another “virus” that daily proves to be more dangerous and deadly: othering.

I define othering simply as seeing others as less or unrelated to oneself or one’s group, often because of ethnic, religious, and/or political differences. Othering is the invisible root of much of the suspicion, hatred, and violence in our world today.

The following article was published on February 22 in Addis Fortune, one of the leading newspapers in Ethiopia. The article focuses on the Ethiopian context, but I believe it has relevance across the world, including in the United States.

Thanks as always for stopping and thinking with me.

Yours,

Andrew

We thought it was a mobile app, an exchange of ideas, a hotel, a newspaper, a website, an interpretation of historical data (one way or another), a name, a bottle of water, a kid dying in the street, unity, justice, a party, or a religion... Read More

Dear friends,

I want to tell you a story from the streets of Addis about a young man named Chala Mohammed.

I was walking home from work in one of the busiest parts of the city on a Thursday (February 6). The sidewalk was packed with a river of people as always at rush hour. Lily said she was making dinner, so I was walking fast.

But then I passed a young man laying completely motionless on the sidewalk. I thought to myself, “He’s probably drunk,” and I kept walking. No one else was stopping or helping, so why should I?

But my conscience arrested me, and I turned around.

At first I thought this young man was dead. He was not moving at all, not even his eyes. There was a small pool of saliva by his mouth. He was like a piece of wood.

But I came close to his face, and he whispered, “Sugar.”

I immediately ran to the nearest cafe, bought him a Mirinda, and slowly poured it into his mouth... Read More

“Between stimulus and response there is space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.” Victor Frankl, Holocaust survivor and psychiatrist

###

How should we respond to devastating disappointment?

This is a crucial question for everyone in the quest for justice.

Martin Luther King, Jr. gave his famous “I Have a Dream” speech. But he also wrote a speech called “Shattered Dreams.”

The struggle for justice often involves the crushing collision of passionate hope and devastating disappointment.

For example, what if – I hope and pray not!!! – the abducted students we all ache for are not returned safely to their families? How will the hundreds of thousands of people out in the streets respond?

Like a nuclear reactor, the collision of hope and disappointment generates extraordinary energy within and between us. This energy often takes the form of fear, grief, anger, and rage.

These emotions are overwhelming, and they make us feel like we are bursting inside and breaking apart... Read More

Dear friends,

Last week, I had the privilege of teaching a 40-hour intensive course in Christian Ethics for fifty West African leaders in Abidjan. As we talked through difficult issues, I was inspired to hear their courageous commitment to fight corruption, ethnocentrism, and violence in the name of Jesus for the common good of Cote d’Ivoire.

The classroom erupted in applause when a woman pastor gave her presentation on ethnicity and neighbor-love and declared,

“Our problem is that ethnic conflicts are created by politics, and people bring these problems into the church. Different ethnicities follow different political leaders, but a pastor should not give privilege to people of one ethnic group above others. Sometimes there is no love for others in the church if they are not from our tribe – they won’t even say their name but only refer to them as ‘this tribesperson.’ We think we are better than other people, and we should not think like this; we are all the same... Read More

Dear friends,

Warm greetings from Abidjan, Côte d’Ivoire in West Africa! Lily and I are overwhelmed by the extraordinarily kind welcome we have received here. Special thanks to our hosts Rev. and Mrs. Kwak and Pastor Soro and Mrs. Kerim.

Yesterday I had the privilege of speaking in a local church about seeing others as our precious neighbors. Entering into this community as strangers and being immediately welcomed as family felt like the most powerful miracle in the world. This is what the eyes of neighbor-love do: they see through every boundary of geography, color, religion, politics, and status and unite us in the bond of love.

I was deeply moved to unpack the Neighbor-Love Covenant through Pastor Soro’s French translation and see literally the entire congregation come forward to sign it. How beautiful that this Covenant, which was printed in Ethiopia’s national language of Amharic, was signed by seventy French-speaking neighbors 3,000 miles away on the opposite side of Africa... Read More

Dear friends,

Last week I invited you to begin 2020 by signing the Neighbor-Love Covenant. I believe neighbor-love begins with our bodies – not ideas, money, or technology. Our bodies can be our most intimate and powerful organs for practicing a life of love for others. This week I’m starting with our eyes.

Yours with gratitude,

Andrew

How do you see others?

This simple question has occupied my mind and spread like a life-giving virus throughout my thinking. I invite you to welcome this question into your being: “How do I see others?”

The way we see others massively influences how we treat others and the kind of interactions, relationships, and cultures we create. The way we see others is the operating system for our lives as social creatures who are constantly meeting others – in our minds, online, in passing, in person.

Seeing others as neighbors is the first practice that embodies the Neighbor-Love Covenant... Read More

Dear friends,

What covenant are you keeping in 2020 as you begin a new year and new decade?

A covenant is a sacred promise that guides our desires, decisions, and actions. It’s our most basic commitment, which we aim to embody in everything else that we say and do.

For example, as a husband who made a marriage covenant with Lily almost ten years ago, I’m always seeking to live as her husband and to love her – wherever I am, with whomever I am, in whatever I’m doing, even if she isn’t around. My marriage covenant has become the overarching context and commitment that defines every other context and commitment in my life. My covenant with Lily is always relevant and at the heart of who I am.

In 2020, I want to invite you to sign and practice the Neighbor-Love Covenant, which I’ll share below.

When Jesus was asked about the key to everlasting life, he said to love God completely and to love your neighbor as yourself... Read More

Dear friends,

The story of Jesus’s birth has never been more inspiring and challenging than it is today. Thanks for stopping and thinking with me about this world-changing event and its implications as we approach 2020.

Merry Christmas!

***

America first! Ethiopia first! Israel first!

We live in a time of nationalism, and we often justify the ultimate importance of our nation by appealing to God. We tell a story about how God has chosen us and promises our group special favor, and thus we are right to put ourselves first, even if it harms others. Our nation’s success is a God-given blessing and duty.

There was every reason to expect the Christmas story to be a religious nationalism story. And this is how the Christmas holiday is often celebrated today. God is with us, we tell ourselves.

But when we read the Gospels’ Christmas stories, they are strikingly anti-nationalistic stories. God isn’t on the side of any nation. God doesn’t get behind the collective identity of any group... Read More

Dear friends,

I’m taking a break from Stop & Think this week as Lily and I prepare to return to Chicago for Christmas. In lieu of my regular essay, I want to recommend my friend Laura Merzig Fabrycky’s fantastic essay “Dietrich Bonhoeffer: The Good Neighbor.” Laura was kind enough to discuss some of my research and work in her essay, and I love how she has centralized Bonhoeffer’s passion for neighbor-love.

Chicago friends, Lily and I would love to see you during this brief visit home away from home!

Merry Christmas,
Andrew.. Read More

Dear friends,

This week I’m reflecting on individualism and the precious treasure of our individuality. Thanks as always for stopping and thinking with me!

Yours with gratitude,
Andrew

###

Few concepts have been so attacked as individualism in recent times.

“The Enlightenment” and “modernity” are routinely blamed for producing individualism. “The West” is condemned for exporting individualism to the rest of the world. The easiest way to cast suspicion on a choice or philosophy is to show that it comes from or leads to individualism.

When I was teaching at Wheaton College, I noticed among my students that “individualism” was often the taken-for-granted villain in what’s wrong with the contemporary world. I have seen the same pattern in my work in Ethiopia.

But I believe this is a serious mistake.

Of course, humans are fundamentally relational creatures. We are born from parents before our wanting or choosing into a particular place and time. We are buried by others after we die... Read More

Dear friends,

What would your life be like if God were on your side? This week I’m reflecting on the signs of authentic spirituality in a time of increasing polarization and conflict.

The Neighbor-Love Movement had a very encouraging soft launch at blueMoon last week. Dr. Eleni Gabre-Madhin wrote, “[The NLM] was without doubt the most incredibly moving event we have ever had… You are my neighbor. I care for you. Period.” Please take a look at our Covenant and consider signing it today. There’s good work ahead.

Yours with gratitude,
Andrew

###

What would your life be like if God were on your side? Who would you be? What would you do?

We live in an increasingly religious world. The old prophecies that “God” was disappearing have proven false. The news is full of stories of religion, from Kanye’s conversion to exploding churches in China. With glitz and glamor, the prosperity gospel preachers promise us health, wealth, and miraculous success if only we give our allegiance and money... Read More

Dear friends,

This week I’m stopping and thinking about contemporary polarization and the ways we see others.

If you’re in Addis, you’re warmly invited to blueMoon at 5:30pm (opposite Sapphire Hotel). I’ll be speaking about the Neighbor-Love Movement and how we might see others as neighbors. Big thanks to Dr. Eleni Zaude Gabre-Madhin for her hospitality.

Yours with gratitude,
Andrew

###

How do you see others?

Seeing others as angels is unfair. It gives them too much credit and sets them up to fail.

Seeing others as demons is also unfair. It gives them too little credit and sets them up to fail.

These seemingly opposite ways of seeing others are actually the same. They both refuse to behold – to see and embrace – the human being. They both need idols – super-human objects – to worship or smash, to adore or destroy.

The Bible’s basic vision of humanity is more complex and subtle. We are neither angels nor demons... Read More

Dear friends,

This week I’m stopping and thinking about a single word at the end of Jesus’s famous prayer. It contains incredible power for personal and cultural transformation. Thanks for joining me in seeking a more authentic, thoughtful life.

Yours with gratitude,
Andrew

###

Kingdom. Power. Glory. KPG.

These three words capture some of deepest drives and desires in the human heart.

How many lives have been destroyed in conflicts over kingdom and power and glory? How many injustices justified? How many families shattered? How many wars fought? How much anxiety and addiction enflamed?

Kingdom is systematic control over others. Power is the active exercise of that control. And glory is the status that arises from that kingdom and power.

When Jesus teaches his followers to pray, Jesus teaches us to renounce these three things. Let them go. Give them up. Make prayer a premeditated act of surrendering KPG.

Whoever we may be and whatever we may be doing, kingdom, power, and glory shouldn’t be part of our agenda... Read More

Dear friends,

Over the last few days, violence in Ethiopia has killed 67 people and wounded many others. (Read more at Reuters and the New York Times.) In light of this situation, I want to invite you to stop and pray with me for peace and justice in Ethiopia. If you’re not a person who prays, I hope these simple words can serve as a reflection for cultivating empathy and care for others in the midst of suffering. If you do pray, consider writing your own prayer for Ethiopia and others who are suffering violence, loss, and grief.

Yours with love and sorrow from Addis,

Andrew

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Our Father in heaven,

Please have mercy on our many sisters and brothers who have been killed and taken from us.

Please embrace and comfort those who are grieving and heartbroken with unbearable loss.

Please sustain and restore the injured and traumatized and those who are caring for them.

Please protect and sooth those who are filled with fear and still in danger for their lives... Read More

Dear friends,

The Association for Women in Business here in Addis recently invited me to give a talk on why men should support women and how men can do this well. I loved this conversation, and I want to share my perspective with you.

As always, thanks to the subscribers who make Stop & Think possible and for your thoughtful feedback. I love hearing from you.

Yours with gratitude,
Andrew

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1. Who Needs Support?

Every human, regardless of age or gender, needs the support of others.

From womb to tomb, we need others’ support simply to exist. But more profoundly, we need one another’s support to flourish, to come fully alive and to discover the meaning of why we exist.

Our need for others is not an unfortunate flaw but a beautiful feature of how God made us. We are not self-sufficient gods. We are interdependent creatures who are made for communication and cooperation with others.

Support comes from two Latin words: sub, which means “from below,” and portare, which means “to carry.”.. Read More

Dear friends,

This week’s essay continues my reflection on God’s declaration, “You are my beloved child; I’m happy with you.” If you try the experiment I suggest, please let me know how it goes.

Congratulations to Ethiopia’s Prime Minister, Dr. Abiy Ahmed, for winning this year’s Nobel Peace Prize. May peace, justice, and reconciliation spread in Ethiopia.

Yours with gratitude,
Andrew

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In “The Divine Declaration,” I invited you to consider that God’s most basic message to you is the same as his only message to Jesus: “You are my beloved child. I’m happy with you.”

Inhaling and internalizing this divine declaration fills our being with dignity, peace, and joy. Before we have done anything or made something of ourselves, God declares his love for us and his delight in us – simply because we exist.

This divine declaration has powerful implications for our relationships with others and the moral quality of our society.

Imagine if we saw and treated others as people for whom God declares, “You are my beloved child... Read More

Dear friends,

This week I’m writing about divine declaration. Hope you all are having a great Fall and hello from Ethiopia!

Rich blessings,
Andrew

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Imagine living your life by embracing that you are lovely and loved by God simply because you exist. Fully accepted at your core. Causing delight. Celebrated as you are created.

Imagine breathing that in and allowing it to oxygenate and illuminate your entire being, even the deepest and darkest parts of your self.

This was the essence of God’s first and only message to Jesus throughout his entire ministry.

God’s words to Jesus are utterly profound and beautiful:

“You are my son, whom I love; with you I am well pleased.” (Matthew 3:17; Mark 1:11; Luke 3:22)

In other words: “Child, I love you. I’m happy with you.”

The phrase “whom I love” translates agapetos – my beloved, the cherished one. The Greek word for “well pleased” (eudokeo) communicates goodness, delight, pleasure: “You are good, delightful, pleasurable.”.. Read More

Dear friends,

This week I’m writing about a recent road trip I took with my parents. The essay reflects on loss, anxiety, and a deep experience of hope I had with my mother. I hope you are encouraged.

Please pray with me as I return for a new semester of service in Ethiopia tonight. I’m excited for the good work ahead.

Rich blessings,
Andrew

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Do you ever fear that you are losing your past or that the best is behind you?

Six years ago, my mother had a serious stroke. It was a Thursday – October 17, 2013. After that night of anguish, her life – and ours – has never been the same.

Mom’s physical abilities, appearance, and personality all dramatically changed. The person who loved spending time with others, who engaged in deep conversation and prayer, who worked out, rode horses, and practiced massage largely transitioned into memory burdened with a deep sense of loss.

Mom is still with us and full of love... Read More

Dear friends,

This week I’m stopping to think about an unusual question: what damns us? I find Jesus’s perspective extremely thought-provoking and liberating. I’d love your feedback and insights from your own experience.

I’m on a crazy road trip with my parents to Maine. I hope you’re off to a good week.

Love,
Andrew

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What disconnects us from God and damns our life? In less spiritual language, what is ultimate loss?

Jesus gives a thought-provoking answer to this question at the end of his first major teaching. As I look back on thousands of sermons in church, I can’t recall a preacher discussing Jesus’s strange statement.

Jesus says that not being known by God is damning and leads to ultimate loss. “I never knew you; away from me,” Jesus replies to those seeking his favor at the last judgment (Matthew 7:23).

Jesus’s words here are counter-intuitive. Jesus doesn’t say, “You didn’t know me.” Many religious people assume that us not knowing God is the obvious path to damnation... Read More

Dear friends,

This week I’m looking at death and lessons it can teach us about living well. Thank you for journeying with me, and special thanks to the subscribers who make Stop & Think possible.

With love,
Andrew

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Every human being will experience death. In fact, part of what makes us uniquely human is that we live with the awareness that we are dying.

Still, death is difficult for us to face. It disturbs and frightens us, and thus we often avoid or deny it, until death visits us.

Christian faith invites us to face death with honesty and hope. It calls us to reflect on death’s meaning and to live in light of what it reveals. Ecclesiastes says, “Death is the destiny of every human; the living should take this to heart” (7:2). Paul wrote, “I face death every day” (1 Corinthians 15:31).

The reflections below are a brief attempt to take death to heart, to spend time facing death and learning from it rather than pushing it away... Read More

Dear friends,

This week I’m reflecting on the liberating power of listening. Special thanks to Roger and Rebecca Sandberg for their incredible hospitality and beautiful practice of listening.

Yours with gratitude,
Andrew

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Last Wednesday, I sat on a beautiful beach and experienced a vital truth: The listener is a liberator.

The Pacific Ocean was a deep aqua green. The sun was drenching everything in its golden light. The waves were crashing into foamy fireworks of white and blue. Surfers were riding the waves, and small children were blissfully playing in the sand. The salty smell of the ocean air filled my lunges, and the refreshing wind blew across my face. The surging, crackling roar of the tide filled my ears with its awe-inspiring music. Not far off the coast, a 235-foot volcanic rock towered above the pounding ocean, magnificently unmoved in the restless water.

It was paradise. Everything was beautiful. It was exactly what I hoped for when my friends invited me to come out for a time of fellowship and renewal in nature... Read More

Dear friends,

One of my goals in Stop & Think is to explore topics that are often ignored or stigmatized in church. This week I’m looking at suicide and healing. I hope this honest essay opens room for you to reveal and listen. Your feedback is always warmly welcome.

Love,
Andrew

Suicide and Healing

I listened to a dear friend this week talk about their struggle with suicide. The darkness had come back, and they found themself thinking about ending it. The loneliness, emptiness, and pain had become unbearable. And yet they also had a nagging sense that their life wasn’t over. So they reached out to a few friends.

I was deeply moved by their courage to reveal themself with me. They talked about a devastating death from their past and enduring pain in their family. They shared about work and friendship and the sense of purposelessness in it all.

My friend then started to ask me a question but quickly interrupted themself... Read More